Mortality and Immortality

a poet passed away yesterday. i do not know why she took the easy way out, but in these difficult times, the easiest way out is the hardest way to comprehend.

i do not know Ana Escalante Neri personally, but i’ve read her works in SunStar Cebu, and the occasional times i passed by her works online. this morning, though, suddenly i felt this connection with her, and i a tear threatened to escape from my left tear duct.

a friend served as the harbinger of her death.

just last night, i had finished reading Illusions by Richard Bach, the same guy who wrote Jonathan Livingston Seagull. The novel tells the story of a reluctant Messiah, who in turn, transforms another gypsy flier into a Messiah.

We ought to transcend these mortal remains, of the illusions being imposed by what we think to be reality. It is difficult to understand why someone as young as Ana, as creative as she is, to take the easy way out of these stupid illusions.

We who remain here are of course saddened by her sudden departure. However, we also ought to see the other side of the coin: she is now free of her mortality, she is now unbound by her physical limitations. surely, she now has immortality secured.

Changes

Seems the Pig of this year (this is the year of the Pig) is kinda rolling in the mud pit. Last night, I took some respite from my self-study of Flash and HTML programming, and basked in my literary ebooks.

I have been meaning to finish Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist. And although I wasn’t spared the fatigue of the past few days (a mix of toxicity and plain serenity), I sat down before our humble yet powerful desktop PC with an open bag of Granny Goose Tortillos and a small cup of Kraft Real Mayo for dipping.

It was close to midnight when I decided to hit the sack. Since I was reading the PDF in full screen mode, I wasn’t aware that I had almost finished the book (I finished page 46 out of 61 pages). Coelho writes that good that the reader is so entranced, he reads and reads until suddenly it is the end of the novel.

I haven’t finished the book, obviously, but I have thought of so much while I was reading. The Alchemist talks about a search, about the Soul of the World, about a language that transcends not only human races but even species.

I have found my Truth, that is clear. However, there is, of course, this new chapter about living with the Truth, and keeping happiness alive with the Truth despite all the misgivings and tragedies of this very, very real world.

My very own search has not ended. If it were to end, would I be happy about an end? However, with this thinking, I am erroneously assuming that I have only one search to make.

We have our very own lives, crisscrossing and interrelated with the lives of others. However, each individual has a special place to find under the Sun, under the Moon, under the Stars, under this infinitesimal galaxy.

apathy stalks the land

they would have gone through
the whole process of repeating themselves
were it not for the silent ones
who had shot themselves in the head.
they were few, they who had martyred
themselves, they who were the minority
entrenched deep within the majority.

one had hostaged a bus full of schoolchildren
with real guns and fake grenades
all the while being praised
by the kids’ grandmothers.
some are the best fighters of the sovereign,
now languishing in jails for pointing out
the wrongs, the mistakes, the glaring

injustices. Injustices, unbelievably in
the plural form.

Apathy stalks the land
is an understatement.
Darkness is bound to shroud
this land both blessed and cursed
with riches and a short memory.

Kalikasan

Nakakalungkot isiping hanggang ngayon, walang konkretong plano ang pamahalaan tungkol sa pag-aalaga ng kalikasan, sa kabila ng mga siyentipikong pag-aaral at mga imbensyong nalikha upang bawasan ang polusyong ginagawa natin. Kahit pa nanalo ng Oscar ang dokumentaryong ginawa ni Al Gore tungkol sa unti-unting kamatayan ng Daigdig, kung tutuusin, wala talagang ginagawa ang mga tao upang mabawasan man lang polusyon.

Sige, purihin natin ang pamahalaan sa pagpapatibay ng Clean Air Act. Pero, naipapatupad ba ito? Tulad ng ibang batas na may marangal na adhikain (ang Violence Against Women at Revised Family Code), nanatiling dokumento ang mga ito, at nararamdaman lamang ng ordinaryong mamamayan kung nababalita sa TV Patrol.

Maraming pabrika pa rin ang walang anti-pollution devices (at kung meron man, ay hindi ginagamit upang makatipid sa kuryente at maintenance costs). Naaalala ko ang isang artikulong ginawa ko tungkol sa mga mamamayan ng Brgy. Quebiawan, San Fernando, Pampanga, at ang kanilang pakikipagtunggali sa pinakamalaking kumpanya sa Pilipinas, ang dakilang buwitreng San Miguel Corporation. Nakasusuka ang ginawa nilang pagdumi sa nag-iisang sapa roon (na tila Ilog San Juan sa may tulay ng Kalentong sa Mandaluyong sa baho at itim).

Buti at may nag-aasikaso sa La Mesa Dam Watershed, sa pag-aalaga nito at pagre-reforest nito. Pero paano naman ang iba pang dam sa Pilipinas? Ang Angat Dam, ang mga dam na nakikinabang sa talon ng Maria Cristina?

Nakakalungkot isiping bukod sa hinahayaan nating patayin tayo sa isip at sa kaluluwa ng isang pekeng pamahalaan ng isang pekeng pangulong pandak, hinahayaan din nating mabulok ang ating kapaligiran. Tama nga naman ang tinuring ng Radioactive Sago Project – na tayong lahat ay baboy. Isang tingin lang sa paligid ang kailangan.

Nakilala ko si Joey Ayala at ang kanyang bandang Bagong Lumad nang ma-engganyo akong sumali sa isang theater workshop noong high school ako. Naaliw ako sa kantang “Manong Pawikan,” na noo’y inaawit ng facilitator namin. Nang makaipon ako, bumili agad ako ng cassette tape ng “Mga Awit ng Tanod-Lupa,” isa sa mga album nila. Minulat ako ng mga awit nila, minulat sa katotohanang saglit lang ang mga buhay natin (Awit ng Mortal), na tayong lahat ay konektado (Magkaugnay), na biktima tayo ng ating sariling mga kapwa na buktot ang paninindigan at paniniwala (Bathala).

Naiwan ko sa Pasig, sa kuwartong kinalakhan ko, ang koleksyon ko ng mga cassette tape nina Ayala at ng kanyang mga kasamang musikerong sina Bayang Barrios, Popong Landero, Onie Badiang, at Cynthia Alexander. Pero ramdam na ramdam ko na ang mga isyung inawit nila noon ay nananatiling mga nagbabagang isyu ngayon, matapos ang higit sa isang dekada mula noong una nilang inawit ang kanilang mga kanta. Kung ako ay nalulungkot, siguro’y mas masakit para sa kanila na hanggang ngayon ay ganun pa rin ang sitwasyon.

Siguro’y ang magagawa na lang natin ay manalangin, umasa sa Bathala ng ating mga ninuno, upang gabayan tayo pabalik sa daang iniwan natin ilang siglo na ang nakararaan.

Bathala
Bathala, likha ninyo ang bawat bagay sa mundo
Lupang kayumanggi’t luntiang bukirin
Alat ng dagat at tamis nitong hangin

Bathala, ang bawat bagay na nagmula sa inyong palad
Ay may tungkulin sa mundong kinagisnan
Sa pagtupad nito ang lahat ay tinitimbang

Ang tao, inyong hinugis at pinaahon sa lupa
Pinagkalooban ng talino at diwa
Upang mundo’y ipagyaman

Talino, naging ararong nagpaamo sa parang
Naging kumpit na sumagupa sa karagatan
Naging apoy na nagpalayas sa karimlan

Sagana sa kayamanan ang mundong inyong likha
At may bahagi rito ang bawat nilalang
Kung susuyuin lang mula sa kalikasan

Subalit, buhay dalisay ay di sapat sa iilan
Sila’y nasilaw sa kinang ng kasakiman
Ganid na diyos ang sinamba

Pinaghahati-hatian po nila ang lupa
Karagatan at himpapawid, ngayo’y may bakod na
Kapwa tao’t hayop ma’y inaagawan ng tahanan
Walang nakaliligtas sa kanilang karahasan
Kaunlaran at kabutihan daw ang kanilang sadya
Subalit ang lumilitaw ay isang panggagahasa

Bathala, ako’y hinugis ninyo’t pinaahon sa lupa
Ang aking buhay ay dito nagmula
At dito rin inaalay

Bathala, bigyang lakas itong inyong Tanod Lupa
Upang umiral sa mapagsamantala
Panalangin ko’y dinggin sana, harinawa
Bathala…

Take Up Arms

They like to push the weak around.

– “Deer Dance,” System of a Down

Does it really take the brains of an idiot to wonder out loud why simple peasants will take up arms against this farce of a government?

Why would someone already burdened by the hard life of farming seek redress by pursuing the harsher conditions of guerrilla life?

Why?

Can the government, in all its wisdom, know why?

Or will the government just blame the insurgency problem, the influence of communists, the rebels?

Fuck that crap. Fuck that shit. Will the government really care? Of course, they don’t. They won’t. They have privatized almost every basic social service. They have made it possible for Filipinos to buy mineral water instead of enjoying the free natural water resources of our very rich country. They have made it possible for the country to have the highest power rates in Southeast Asia despite the number of active volcanoes in the country, despite the number of river systems and waterfalls, despite the number of super typhoons that visit us every year.

Try to imagine, because I simply cannot in the midst of my rage. They have even deployed soldiers in the slum areas of the metropolis. How low can this government get? How dare they instill fear among people who have sought the relative safety of the capital region far from the maddening militarization of the countryside?

Ang Sistema/1

Hindi gumagana ang burukrasya.
Nagsasalita ang mga pulitiko pero wala namang sinasabi.
Bumoboto ang mga botante pero hindi naghahalal.
Nagkakalat ng maling impormasyon ang midya.
Kamangmangan ang itinuturo ng mga eskwelahan.
Pinarurusahan ng mga hukom ang mga biktima.
Dinidigma ng mga sundalo ang kanilang mga kababayan.
Hindi sinusugpo ng mga pulis ang krimen dahil abala sila sa paggawa nito.
Ang pagkalugi’y sosyalisado, ang kita’y isinasapribado.
Mas malaya ang salapi kaysa tao.
Ang tao’y alipin ng mga bagay.

Salin ni Ronalyn Olea mula sa tula ni Eduardo Galeano

Magellan’s Cross – A Postcard View

Magellan’s Cross in Cebu City, the birthplace of Christianity in the Philippines. Lotsa vendors will offer candles and prayers for a fee. Say a prayer while inside, will you? And take photos as discreetly as possible. Some come here to ACTUALLY pray, not to ogle at the cross.

alisa took the shot with our gift of a digicam, courtesy of my father-in-law

February

oh yes. the month of Love, as commercialism dictates. Wikipedia, though, says February came from the Latin word februum, which means purification.

In that sense, i would like to call attention to what we have as a country that we often refer to, grudgingly, as The Government.

In a few months’ time, we’ll be electing a new set of “leaders.” (I’d rather put that honorable word in quotation marks, considering the low quality of majority of the elected “leaders” that we now have.)

Informally, the campaign season has begun, since the filing of candidacies for local and national offices were opened a few weeks back. Please keep in mind, though, that as per the Omnibus Election Code of this so-called country that we have, candidates for local offices are only allowed to spend P3 per voter, while those running for national offices (which, for this year’s elections, are only for the Senate positions) are allowed to spend P5.

As responsible voters, we also must begin a campaign against graft and corruption, against lawless violence, against state-sponsored terrorism. These issues seem cliche, but they are REAL issues, as opposed to issues of whose better between Cueshe and Hale (is there really a comparison?), or between FHM and Maxim (huh? both only aspire to whet your sexual appetite, and thus blind you to the unseeming realities of our banana republic).

The so-called president (uncouth and unseeming, a freak of Pampanga) says she will ensure clean and honest elections. Let us not forget that she had also stated that she would not run for president way, way back.

So, for all the romance and the red roses and the red wine that threaten to overflow this month, let us not forget that this month was meant for purification. And by May, we should have cleansed ourselves from all evil to visit the sacred election booth and register our opposition to the evil that has spread all over the country.

I’m crossing my fingers, though.

The Filipino

There is always this debate about what makes a Filipino. From those born in the islands to those born to Filipino parents overseas, there’s always a question about a Filipino’s identity.

However, among ourselves, we have this problem about what makes a Filipino. Is it about knowing ethnic music, wearing ethnic jewelry, and espousing ethnic culture? Or is it about knowing the latest fad among Filipinos, and in the process of knowing, being one with the masses? Or is it about being nationalistic, of being protective about one’s language?

After my transfer here to the Queen City of the South, I suddenly found it ridiculous to define who the Filipino is.

How do you find one’s identity? Simple. One digs and digs in one’s history, until one is able to understand its lessons.

I had found my identity as a Filipino through educational, albeit revolutionary programs such as Jim Paredes’ Tatak Pilipino. And when I got to the state university, I had even managed to be a member of the Kontemporaryong Gamelan Pilipino, an ensemble of musicians and dancers from the university’s colleges. The group specializes in adapting ethnic Filipino music and dance to contemporary tastes.

Back to the south. There is some degree of discrimination here against those who hail from Manila, which is most probably something Cebuanos and other Bisaya feel (and even fear) when they get to the capital.

In several occasions I had found myself defending my lineage, pointing out that though I was born in Manila (in Mandaluyong City, specifically), my parents both come from Iloilo, and in our household, Kiniray-a is the tongue of choice.

Apparently, Kiniray-a is the mother language of Hiligaynon, the present language among Western Visayans, since the epic Hinilawod is recorded in Kiniray-a.

Basically, I had to prove that I was also a Bisaya. So, is there a hierarchy of identity? That before one is a Filipino, one must be a member of the islands’ various regional groups?

One’s identity is only in one’s mind. On Judgment Day, would it really matter if one were a Filipino or an American? If aliens were to arrive and attack our planet, would it really matter if one were a Filipino or Dutch?

Who knows? Might be that aliens would not attack Filipinos, simply because they would not want to waste precious energy.

Made in China

The BBC website recently reported China’s launch of a missile that had shot down a satellite. Of course, perfunctory reactions from the world’s supposed great nations, such as imperial United States and lackey Japan, were in no short supply in deriding China’s act of surging militarism.

We have long considered China as a sleeping giant. One of the world’s oldest surviving civilizations, the Chinese are credited with a myriad of inventions and innovations. There is no doubt about what scientific, technological, philosophical, and social debts we owe the Chinese.

However, what lurks dangerously in the horizon is the slow but sure rise of China’s military might. What scares me is the thought that we know nothing about China’s weapon systems and technologies, and how modern these are.

We all know about how economically powerful China is. Almost all items on my table are labeled “Made in China.” We all know how threatening Chinese cheap labor is, how it can depress all our salaries and render us workless and worthless. We even acknowledge that almost all of us Filipinos derive some percentage of our blood from ancient Chinese seafarers.

Unknowingly, we are powering China’s military, equipping them with the latest military science and technology. Unknowingly, we are slowly becoming slaves to their economy, all of us rendered blind by their cheap prices, and drowned by the flood of their products.

I honestly believe the Chinese has no idea of benevolence. Henry Sy has shopping malls all over the country, employing thousands of Filipinos into an endless and vicious cycle of contractualization. There are hundreds of Filipino-Chinese entrepreneurs, but I have never personally heard a friend or an acquaintance praise his/her Filipino-Chinese employer for benevolence. Even the novelist F. Sionil Jose has criticized the Filipino-Chinese community for doing nothing about the poverty of this country.

Does China know the meaning of benevolence? I honestly think not. I honestly believe the Chinese still consider themselves as the civilized race, while the rest of the world are all barbarians. Look at what had happened to the peace-loving Buddhists in Tibet. Look at what had happened to the nomads of Mongolia. Look at what had happened to student-activists at Tiananmen Square.

Then look at what had happened to Indonesia when they started chasing the Chinese off their lands.

Though many had welcomed the opening-up of the Chinese economy to free trade and capitalism, I strongly believe that it was to basically trap the world economy into thinking it has subjugated the Chinese. In truth, it is the other way around – the Chinese has successfully subjugated the world economy, and their entry into the World Trade Organization will only galvanize their stranglehold.

We are powering one of the world’s most racist, most pervasive, most complex, most hierarchical, and most persevering societies. We are unknowingly boosting their economy and strengthening their military. Someday, we may wake up trampled on by pairs upon pairs of shiny black boots of Red Army soldiers.